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Removing You Will Take Time

March 2, 2018

Removing your pictures
from the poster boards hanging on my wall
wasn't difficult
learning that I can extract
the guilt, the sad cities
I cried over and carried with me all these years
wasn't impossible
trying to empty
all of the tired from my bones
the hunger from my happiness
trying to drain
the shade you had begun turning me into,
was the most exhausting
form of punishment I have had to put my body through.
The withdrawal of
leaving you -
feels like a person moving out
while they've unpacked half of what they're
supposed to be taking
with them.
I made you move out
and I don't regret the years you've lived here
my heart, the good, the bad - but damn,
look at the mess
you've left behind. I'll be
unpacking and repacking these boxes
for years
wondering what I did wrong
(nothing but I'll wonder anyway)
Because it was simple
taking the needle out of my veins
what about the toxins
I'd already let in


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